25+ Real Brides Spill Their Biggest Wedding Regrets
Let’s be honest, even the most magical weddings aren’t without a few hiccups. Despite all the excitement and bustle, it’s easy to overlook the little things that matter most. Sure, you’re marrying the love of your life (#blessed), but in retrospect, there are a few things you wish you could’ve done differently.
Hold on though, you’re not alone! Regrets on the big day? It’s more common than you think. Weddings can be a whirlwind of emotions, and surprise, surprise, regret sometimes creeps in.
Over the years, we’ve had heart-to-heart chats with hundreds of brides and grooms, and you’d be amazed by the similarity in their post-wedding reflections. So, we thought we’d do you a solid and compile a list of the most common wedding day regrets and blunders, hoping you can dodge them when your big day rolls around. We promise, it’s not all gloomy – it’s about being aware and making the best decisions for your day.
Let’s get started!
How Common Are Post-Wedding Regrets Among Couples?
Did you know that a whopping 76% of folks say that if they could go back, they’d change some aspect of their wedding? Yup, that’s right. And get this – nearly half of those polled, a significant 43%, revealed they have some downright regrets about their big day (yikes!).
But hey, it’s not all gloom and doom. In fact, an impressive 90% of these folks are quick to point out that the good stuff still outweighed any issues. Pretty interesting, right?
1. “Wish I had started the day a little earlier”
“I regret how rushed I felt morning of our wedding. I thought I would be very relaxed, but instead it was kind of a mess and my mom wasn’t there to help me get dressed because she was racing back to get dressed herself. Not anyone’s fault really, just wish I had started the day a little earlier and kept track of the time better.”
“I regret not planning the day better. It was a 6 guest wedding and we still ended up feeling rushed. I underestimated the time we’d need to get ready, but it turns out my family didn’t get ready right away when they got back to their rooms, and I was urgently calling them for pictures.”
To ensure a relaxed start to your wedding day:
- Plan a detailed schedule with extra time for preparation
- Share the schedule with your wedding party and family
- Delegate tasks to trusted individuals for assistance
- Get a good night’s sleep beforehand
- Wake up earlier than you think you need to
- Create a calming environment with music or candles
- Enjoy a nourishing breakfast
- Stay hydrated throughout the morning
2. “Involving Other People was Too Much Stress”
“The wedding in general. Not the marriage. But we shouldn’t have had a traditional wedding. Involving other people was too much stress.
Actual wedding day regrets:
– trying to include a friend by making him the officiant instead of hiring a professional.
– Not smiling in my photos (see previous comment about other people creating stress)
– not reviewing contracts with vendors more thoroughly/researching what is standard for wedding vendors/managing expectations. I was pleased with the majority of my vendors but I didn’t give my photographer’s contract too good a look before signing and I was not terribly happy with how my photos were edited, but I’ll take the L on it because I didn’t do my due diligence”
“Inviting family that were miserable over friends that would have had fun”
“Too many bridesmaids. Period.”
To reduce the stress caused by involving other people in your wedding planning process, consider these practical steps:
- Reflect on Your Vision: Simplify your plans to match what you truly want.
- Limit Decision-Makers: Involve a small group to avoid conflicting opinions.
- Hire Professionals: Hire experts to handle important tasks and ease your workload.
- Set Clear Boundaries: Communicate your preferences clearly to manage expectations.
- Seek Help from a Wedding Planner: Consider hiring a wedding planner to handle logistics and coordination.
- Keep Communication Open: Keep open communication with loved ones, sharing your thoughts and listening to their input.
- Trust Your Gut: Trust your instincts and prioritize decisions that bring you joy and peace of mind.
3. “Not Taking More Time Off After the Wedding”
“Not taking more time off after the wedding. Our wedding was on Friday and we went back to work on Monday and that was a mistake. (Our honeymoon was not immediately following the wedding.”
Few tips:
- Extend Your Break: Instead of rushing back to work right after the wedding, plan to take additional days off. Give yourself extra time to relax and adjust to married life.
- Delay the Honeymoon: If your honeymoon isn’t immediate, schedule it for a later date. This way, you can still enjoy a romantic getaway and have something to look forward to after the wedding.
- Communicate with Your Employer: Let your employer know in advance about your plan for extra time off. Discuss the details and ensure a smooth transition without conflicts.
- Prioritize Relaxation: During your extended break, focus on self-care and relaxation. Engage in activities that help you unwind, spend quality time with your spouse, and rejuvenate yourselves.
4. “Would have preferred a smaller wedding”
“First wedding, we ended up with 80 people, including second cousins on the groom’s side. I knew I didn’t want that many in the first place, but he insisted. I won’t say I regret it — I think taking account of the preferences of both parties is important — but I definitely would have preferred a smaller wedding. Second wedding was a dozen people. It was a lot more fun.”
“A big wedding- 100ish guests. We didn’t have time to get to really enjoy anyone at the wedding and I didn’t feel we had much time for ourselves either- we did get a first look on and then snuck away for sunset photos so that was nice.
But we didn’t get any pictures with anyone except those immediate family members with the photographer. I’d have liked to have had more with extended family and especially those friends and family that traveled to see us.”
If you feel that big wedding is stressing you out, consider these simple steps:
- Talk with Your Partner: Discuss your wedding size preferences openly and consider each other’s views. Find a compromise that makes both of you happy.
- Set Guest List Boundaries: Establish clear limits for your guest list, prioritizing close relationships and intimacy. Stick to your decision to keep the wedding smaller.
- Explore Alternative Formats: Consider non-traditional options like micro-weddings or elopements, which offer a more intimate and enjoyable experience.
5. “Not Hiring People to Clean Up After”
“Not hiring people to clean up after (this is the only one I would DEFINITELY do differently, my mom talked me out of it, but I should have not listened to her and hired people anyway so none of our family would have had to deal with it).” – Stephanie
By hiring professionals for post-wedding cleanup, you can relieve your family from the task and ensure everyone enjoys the celebration to the fullest.
6. “Overspending”
Many couples regret spending too much on their wedding. This is understandable, considering the average wedding cost can be hefty. The stress from financial overspending can even trickle into the early stages of marriage.
Establish a budget early on and stick to it. Remember, the most important thing is that you’re getting married to the love of your life. It’s not about the extravagance of the day.
7. “Neglecting the Guest Experience”
Some couples get so wrapped up in planning the perfect wedding that they forget to consider their guests’ experiences.
Remember that your guests’ comfort and enjoyment are essential. Choose a comfortable and accessible venue, plan a palatable menu, and ensure there are enough amenities and entertainment.
8. “Not Hiring a Professional Photographer”
Your wedding day will fly by, and all you’ll have left are memories. Many couples regret not hiring a professional to capture those precious moments.
Allocate a portion of your budget to hire a skilled photographer who can capture your wedding’s essence.
9. “Overlooking the Videographer”
“Not having a videographer is something I regret. I didn’t think I cared about video and wasn’t even dithering about getting one, but now I wish I did. We have some video from guests, but the plan to have the ceremony recorded feel through so a lot just didn’t get recorded. I’d recommend getting video if you can. I also just heard about “phoneographers” after my wedding and wish I had that! Some high quality phone pictures and video while waiting for pro photos would have been amazing.”
While photos capture moments, a video captures the atmosphere, the speeches, the laughter, and the dancing – the life of the party. Consider hiring a professional videographer. It’s another investment, but one you’re likely to appreciate when you can relive your special day years down the line.
10. “Stressing Too Much”
“Absolutely nothing, other than stressing too much during planning !! And this is saying a lot coming from a bride who didn’t even want a wedding to begin with. I stressed the details, how much everything cost, and postponed due to not knowing how to deal with the planning stress. We had a lot of problems including having to fire our wedding planner, losing a hotel block, our photographer got pregnant and couldn’t travel, the list goes on and on. Everything will turn out perfect and in the moment you won’t care what went wrong. Try to enjoy the journey 
“
“Worrying about things that didn’t matter on the day. Focus your energy on good food, free alcohol and good music”
Many couples regret allowing the stress of planning and executing the wedding to overtake their joy.
Hire a wedding planner, delegate tasks, and remember what’s most important about the day – marrying your partner. Keep things in perspective and try to enjoy the journey as much as the destination.
11. “Skimping on the Honeymoon”
After the whirlwind of wedding planning and the big day itself, you’ll want some downtime with your new spouse. Some couples regret not prioritizing the honeymoon in their wedding budget.
Your honeymoon is the start of your new life together. Don’t skimp on it. Even a simple, budget-friendly getaway can be magical if it’s thoughtfully planned.
12. “Not Eating”
“I didn’t eat 
Couldn’t get a buzz I wish I would have enjoyed cocktail hour!”
“Not eating enough, and make sure your photo list is as specific as you can get!! I forgot to get pics with certain individuals of just us cause I didn’t write it down! It made me so upset realizing after.”
“Was so stressed I barely ate all day, then was so excited barely ate the wedding dinner… but I sure was drinking. Drank wayyyy to much with no food. Horrible combo that equals a wasted bride. The photos are great tho.”
It may sound trivial, but many brides and grooms get so caught up in the day that they forget to eat!
Make it a priority to sit down and enjoy the meal you’ve carefully chosen for your wedding. Your body needs the energy to enjoy the day fully.
13. “Caving to Family Pressure”
Every family member has their idea of the perfect wedding. Couples often regret making decisions based on family pressure instead of what they wanted.
While it’s important to respect everyone’s wishes, this is your day. Make decisions that align with your dreams and desires, not just those of your family.
14. “Not having someone record the ceremony, speeches & dance”
You can either hire a professional videographer, or you can assign a reliable person (could be one of your wedding party) to set up a stand with a smart phone with camera or a camera. They can keep checking here and there.
15. “Got drunk and can’t remember much past 9pm”
“Got drunk and can’t remember much past 9pm! The lesson is: don’t do a ton of shots at your wedding.”
Some tips to avoid getting too drunk quickly:
- Set Limits: Track how much you can drink and stick to it.
- Alternate with Non-Alcoholic Drinks: Mix alcoholic beverages with non-alcoholic ones to stay hydrated and in control.
- Ask for Help: Have a trusted friend monitor your alcohol intake and remind you to drink responsibly.
- Eat Well: Have a good meal before the wedding to slow down alcohol absorption.
- Stay Present: Enjoy each moment mindfully, engaging with guests and the celebration without relying solely on alcohol.
- Drink Water: Stay hydrated by drinking water throughout the night.
16. “Trying to Please Everyone”
“I regret trying to please my MIL (applies to any family member) with what they want and not doing what we wanted to do. It’s your day. It’s important to set boundaries.”
It’s impossible to make everyone happy. Some couples regret spending too much energy trying to accommodate every guest’s wishes. At the end of the day, the wedding is a celebration between you and your spouse.
Remember, it’s your day. You can’t possibly cater to everyone’s preferences. As long as you’re considerate and thoughtful, your guests will understand.
17. “Forgetting to Soak it All In”
Many couples get so caught up in the minute details that they forget to step back and soak in the moment. Everything will feel like a blur on the big day and you might be missing out on some precious memories if you don’t take a deep breath and enjoy the day.
Take a few moments throughout the day to take everything in – your spouse, your family, your friends, the setting. These are the moments that you’ll remember and cherish.
In the end, your wedding day is a celebration of the love between you and your partner. While planning the perfect day, remember what truly matters – the commitment and promise you’re making to each other. In doing so, you can minimize regrets and make your wedding day a joyous event you’ll look back on with nothing but fondness.
19. “Wish we had budgeted for a wedding coordinator right at the beginning”
“We are getting married in three weeks, and I will IMMEDIATELY say that I wish we had budgeted for a wedding coordinator right at the beginning. We ended up making it happen within this final month because I literally had a panic attack at one point from stress during the planning process…she has been a LITERAL GODSEND. She’s taking care of vendor communication, bullshit drama from people, entire timeline of rehearsal details and wedding day, emergency day-of kit, setup of reception space, making sure we have precious moments to ourselves throughout the evening, making sure we can actually enjoy the food/drinks we’re paying for, etc. I feel SO much calmer as we approach the big day because of her.”
20. “Not having a super detailed list of photos that I wanted to take”
“Not giving the photographer a list of who I’d like pictures with, I haven’t got one with one of my daughters & I haven’t got one of all of my grandchildren together” – Sue
“I had a very basic list of photos I wanted the photographer to take (ie bridal party, husband’s family, bride and Mum)… and I wish I’d put more thought into it. We only had the photographer for a few hours and in the excitement of the ceremony there are some photos we didn’t take but I wish we would have – ie a group photo with everyone and my husband with his army brothers.” – Dan
“Not having a super detailed list of photos that I wanted to take. In the craziness of it all so many photos weren’t taken. Not my photographers fault, half the people that were supposed to be there early didn’t show up on time so there just wasn’t enough time to take them all and since we didn’t write it down, there was no way to figure out what was the priority”
21. “Not going dress shopping early enough!”
“Not going dress shopping early enough! So I had to settle. Also not doing a first look! Highly regret it! And lastly should have researched photographers more than I did. I paid 7k for photo and video and it was really too good to be true. I should have paid more for better photos etc.” – Val
“Buying a dress that I didn’t really love, RESIST THE IMPULSES!!!”
22. “Not taking time to enjoy the wedding”
“Not taking time to enjoy the wedding. When they say take a minute to take it all in… listen”
“Not getting the alone time I so desperately wanted with my husband. We scheduled it but let the momentum of the day steamroll over it.”
23. “Spent too much on DIY”
“Scheduling the time at 5pm and doing too much DIY. I hardly slept for two days prior to the wedding trying to get everything ready. I felt like I depended too much on my family to know what I wanted and they had to juggle so much and having the ceremony at 5pm it only gave us like 4.5 hours to do everything. It just flew by.”
24. “Thinking 18 months was enough time to plan”
“I know I had a year and I kind of wish I had 2 years to plan better,it’s been rushed and stressful so far lol”
“I had 13 months too. My wedding is now in about 5 days and I’m still organising things! Aghh. It’s a destination wedding though so that didn’t help.”
25. “Inviting someone I didn’t want to invite.”
“Inviting family that were miserable over friends that would have had fun”
“Inviting more of my friends rather than family members that i really don’t talk to
“
“Inviting people that really didn’t deserve to be there.”
References
